두서없이 떠오르는 몇 가지 생각들...

하나
아주 간단해 보이는 일이다. 하지만 막상 해결하려들면 점점 더 미궁 속으로 빠져 어디서 무엇이 잘못되었는 지 혼란스런 그런 것들이 있다.
그 속을 들여다보면...

1.문제를 해결해줄 사람은 막상 그 부탁을 들어주면 자신에게 피곤한 선례를 남기게 된다는 압박감에 적당한 연관관계에 있는 다른 곳으로 책임을 돌린다.
2.그 곳에서는 정작 자신의 관할이 아니기 때문에 적극적으로 들어주기도 그렇고 완전히 부정하자니 나중에 책임분쟁에 휘말릴 수 있다는 생각에 제 3의 중재기관으로 떠넘긴다. 그곳의 처분으로 처리하면 최소한의 면피는 할 수 있다는 생각이다.
3.정작 그 중재기관은 왜 이리로 바로 왔느냐 이 일을 처리하는 곳은 1번이라고 아주 간단하게 말한다.
별것 아니라는 생각했던 그 일상사는 세기적 미스터리에 빠지고 마는 것이다.
주변의 일조차 이 정도이거늘...메가톤급 이해관계가 거미줄처럼 얽힌 국제적 사건들을 생각하면 세상이 이정도로 그럭저럭 돌아간다는 게 신기해질 따름이다.


누군가와 대화를 할 때 사람들은 항상 상대의 아이덴티티를 파악하려고 애를 쓴다. 그래야 상대가 적인지 아군인지, 능력이 있는 지, 없는 지, 이익이 될지 피해가 될지등에 대한 판단이 가능하기 때문이다.
반정부 세력-허수아비 정부-미국의 삼각구도를 우리 자신을 포함해서 역사적으로 수없이 발견할 수 있다. 그래서 '반정부 세력'이라는 아이덴티티와 입장을 어느 정도 미루어 짐작해보게 되는데 이번에는 그것조차 쉽지 않아 보인다. 때론 푼돈을 노리는 강도 근성을 보이기도 하고 때론 강한 이데올로기적 태도를 보이기도 하고...이해관계의 얽힘을 뻔히 알면서 엉뚱한 곳을 물고 늘어지는 전략적 애매함을 택하기도 한다.
결국, 해결하려는 의지를 가진 쪽이나 방관하는 쪽이나 키를 쥐고 있는 쪽이나 태도의 모호함 속에서 헤어나지 못하고...그럼에도 필요한 긴장감은 사람의 희생으로 채워지고 있다.


다시 첫번째로 돌아가보자 문제를 해결하겠다고 나선 사람의 주변인들은 우선 주인공을 타박한다. 1번의 주인공도 공격을 방어하기 급급해서 엉뚱한 핑계를 만들어 내기 바쁘다. 더군다나 그 사람이 '이 정도 일 쯤이야 내가 책임지고 해결하지'라는 선언이라도 했다면 상황은 더 심각해진다.
그 쯤 되면 그 사건이 해결되지 못하고 있는 본질적 정황에 대한 사고는 뇌리에서 점점 희미해져간다.

사용자 삽입 이미지
근처의 공단에서 얼마전에 중동과 동남아 무슬림 출신 노동자들이 인질석방을 위한 촛불시위를 벌였다. 버지니아공대 사건 때 우리의 오버가 살짝 생각나기도 하고 그들의 불안감과 절박함이 이해가 가기도 했다.

사람은 행동은 기본적으로 이기심에서 출발한다.
그게 타인들이 보기에 좋으면 이타심이 되고
타인들이 보기에 마음에 안들면 졸렬한 이기심으로 비춰진다.
그럼 공동체를 위한 존중과 희생적 행동은?
공동체의 질서를 지키려고, 때론 손해를 무릎쓰고, 노력하고 남들에게 지킬 것을 요구하는 건 그 질서가 궁극적으로 자신의 안전을 확보해준다는 신념이 무의식적으로든 의식적으로든 작용하기 때문이다.
하지만  누구도 너무도 당연한 본성인 이기심의 발로를 쉽게 인정하지 못한다.
그래서 정체도 불명확한 공공의 아름다운 선이라는 가치로 서로 물리고 물리는 악다구니 속으로 빠져들고 본질은 점점 미스터리화 되어간다.
단지 미스터리만 되는데서 그치는 게 아니라 서로들 자신의 입장이 옳음을 증명해내려고 뜬금없는 부스럼을 긁어내고 상처를 주는 것이다.
이 쯤되면 소위 '어처구니' 없는 상황들에 당황하기도 민망할 지경이다.


뭐 꼭 어떤 사건을 두고 하는 얘기는 아니다.

트랙백 192, 댓글이 없습니다.

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